My cousin, Jen, who was pregnant along with me (we were due within a week of each other) found out last week that she had a missed miscarriage. That means that she had no symptoms of a miscarriage, but when she went to have an ultrasound, the doctor found that the baby had no heartbeat and had stopped developing two weeks prior. Jen told me about it last week, but I feel I can post my thoughts/feelings on this now, since she made a post of it on her blog:
http://konkle.ca/weblog/

I was very saddened to hear about the news; I had been thinking/worrying about miscarriages for a while and was trying to understand how I would feel if someone gave me bad news about my baby. It is very hard, if not impossible, for me to understand, though, how that would make me feel. Likewise, I cannot even begin to understand the enormity of loss that Jen feels. I do know, though, that I feel very sad. For Jen (because I can understand the excitement and anticipation of a coming baby), for Scott and Eben and the rest of their family, for myself (because my pregnancy and our children will not have a shared 'bond'), and for my baby (because I kind of thought of Jen's baby as my baby's 'twin'). It is my worst fear right now that a similar thing should happen to me, but I will not find out for at least 4 weeks from now. This has all been weighing heavily on my mind.

I have to console myself with the fact that a miscarriage (for Jen, me, or anyone else) most likely means that something was wrong with the baby or its development. I think it is easier to lose a 10-week old fetus than a 10-week old child (after birth). I'm glad Jen has a lot of support from her family, and that Eben is a source of happiness for her during this time. I would like Jen to have only healthy and happy babies, and so I will look forward to the future when she tells me again that she's pregnant and we can share stories and experiences and laughter. I would like our kids to know each other and to enjoy each others' company! I'm looking ahead to happy times...